By Corin Magee, MS, TLLP
Whether it’s a workplace, a school, or the medical system, our clients often find themselves struggling to navigate the everyday systems of living. They come in feeling overworked, inadequate, and lazy for asking for something as simple as a five-minute break or a pair of noise-cancelling headphones. For anyone who doesn’t fit the model of a cisgender, heterosexual, white, male billionaire, it’s a simple fact: the world we live in is not set up to encourage our success.
Many of our clients are exhausted from perpetually advocating for themselves just to exist inside the same systems that have been used to oppress them and their ancestors. When the world disempowers you and tells you it’s your fault at the same time, you end up anxious, depressed, distrustful, and guilty about all of those feelings. Clients come into therapy saying that no matter what they do, they can’t “succeed” without working themselves into the ground and burning out the parts of themselves they love most.
And they’re right. You can’t win in a broken system. But what you can do is rebel.
Rebellion as a clinical practice
As a therapist working with queer and disabled people, a large part of my work is helping clients find environments and habits that let them be their full, authentic selves in a world that was built against them. Here are some of my favorite ways to break oppressive rules, for yourself and for others, and redefine your own success.
When the world yells at you to keep working, take a moment to pause. Breathe, make art, dance in your kitchen. Do anything that makes you smile and gives you a moment of joy and whimsy.
When the system tells you to make yourself small and quiet, blast your music from the rooftops. Stand up tall, hands on your hips, and be here. Holler in frustration, sing in joy, laugh out loud. Use your voice to connect with friends or to advocate for your own needs.
When the bad news weighs you down and numbs you to suffering, fix small hurts. Wash your dishes. Reach out to a loved one for support. Anything that reminds you there are things you can do, every day, to help yourself and others.
When you feel overwhelmed and isolated, reach out for help. There are fellow rebels everywhere. The people who love us can remind us that our problems can be shared. Finding spaces where you can exist outside the pressure of conventional success is how you rest and recover. Support local events and join meetups that share your values.
When you hear the familiar tone of “not enough,” remember that the concept of “enough” is false at its core. One person works best in a loud environment, energized by the crowds bustling through a mall. Another works best in complete silence except for the clack of their own keyboard. Switch them around and neither gets anything done. They quite simply won’t be “good enough,” because they weren’t set up to be. The key to success is finding the space that sets you up to do and feel your best. That may take a bit of rebellion.
Clinically reviewed by Mel Whalen, PhD, LP — Licensed Psychologist, Michigan #6301015759.
Something here sound familiar?
You don’t have to have it figured out to begin. Tell us a little about what’s going on and we’ll match you with the clinician who fits.
Or text us: (810) 394-8921 — no phone calls needed.
Telehealth across Michigan · In-person options in Washtenaw County
#burnout #disability #queer #neurodivergent #selfadvocacy #rest #workplacestress #queertherapist #therapy #mentalhealth #annarbor #michigantherapist #forestfernscounseling
